Get the first impression right - it's extremely hard to undo

Making a great first impression is critical to effective communication and influence. The reason is that the human brain is a prediction machine. Meaning that it interacts with the world based on what it anticipates will happen.

The first impression people have of you becomes the data that their brain uses to predict future interactions with you. It will either be positive or negative - it will rarely be neutral.

Think of a time when you met someone and for some reason they rubbed you the wrong way. Your brain stored that data. Then, when you met them again, it’s likely that your brain used that stored data and created expectations of the latest interaction - likely in a negative way.

Similarly, it’s important to remember that when you meet someone, they are not seeing you through a neutral lens. Subconsciously, their brain is making a prediction of what to expect based on its previous experiences and information.

An example is what happens to us when we are buying a car and are approached by a salesperson. You have never met the person before, but like many people you are likely instinctively get your guard up as your brain anticipates that the salesperson is there to pressure and manipulate you. This is often wrong - but it is based on the image of the “sleezy salesperson” that popular culture has embedded into consumers' brains.

This is why first impressions matter. It is your chance to influence the data that first enters into your counterpart's mind, which will then influence all subsequent interactions. The more effort you put into strategically doing this at the onset, the less work you will have to do in the future to undo incorrect information.

A strategic way of doing this is to capitalize on the same prediction-making tendency that can hurt you. Here’s an example.

Let’s say you are giving a presentation at a meeting of banking executives. To create a good first impression, it’s strategic to dress similarly to them (or one notch higher), appear well-groomed, communicate in a clear and concise manner with the BLUF - bottom line up front, and stand with good posture.

The reason this works is that you are strategically mirroring their culture and norms. This will make them more initially receptive to you by influencing their brain's prediction-making mechanism that “this person is of us”.

A counterargument some may have is that this is not being authentic. I can understand that point. My response is to to see the first impression as a communication tool that you strategically wield to achieve the ultimate goal of communication, which is understanding and message alignment.

So the next time you are meeting a new group of professionals that you need to influence, ensure that you are strategic with making your first impression - it is the foundational data upon which all future encounters will be based.